Well, yesterday was a Day of Despair.
I didn't get it. I didn't get the job. I didn't get the job I wanted, had wanted so badly for the last two or three months, had been counting on to save me from the disintegration that is about to take place in my current place of work.
I was amazed to discover how much I had been counting on it. It was devastating to hear that they had gone with someone else. I had done all of this planning in my head about how good it was all going to be, how thankful I was going to be to be gone from here.
And now I'm stuck here, because I've got bills to pay and this need to eat. Which sucks really. So I'm going to have to work on that.
Also it is humid and running has taken on a lot of the same qualities as swimming.
28 July 2006
26 July 2006
Thunk
So the job I'd like checked my references on Monday: its between me and one other candidate. Of course, now its Wednesday and I haven't heard anything so I'm becoming more sure by the day that they are not going to pick me. Damn but I want this job. It would mean a lot of good things: I'd get to do something I really like fairly frequently, rather than every-once-in-awhile-as-my-hectic- schedule-permits (teach), I'd be in a better living situation, a better pay situation, working more reasonable hours, within reach of a viable support system (family) and a greater number of resources. Please oh please oh please.
So last night I bough Ice Cream Of Despair and then checked the answering machine one last time: no job offers. So I had ice cream for dinner and then went running afterward. Its a bad idea, and I knew that, but I made it three miles and called it good. I came back to write down my patheticism and looked at the training calendar and I was supposed to have done 4 or 5 miles with 4 100-meter pick ups. Damn it. I guess I need to look at the calendar before I run (or eat crappy junk-food dinner). So I'll try and do that today.
I hope I get good news.
So last night I bough Ice Cream Of Despair and then checked the answering machine one last time: no job offers. So I had ice cream for dinner and then went running afterward. Its a bad idea, and I knew that, but I made it three miles and called it good. I came back to write down my patheticism and looked at the training calendar and I was supposed to have done 4 or 5 miles with 4 100-meter pick ups. Damn it. I guess I need to look at the calendar before I run (or eat crappy junk-food dinner). So I'll try and do that today.
I hope I get good news.
25 July 2006
Who knew?
I wanted absolutely nothing to do with getting up this morning. Which is funny, since I went to bed at the extremely reasonable hour of 9:30 last night. Lately more often than not I'm not in bed until after 11, and this past weekend it was more like 1am. So I don't know why I had no problem getting up then and this morning it took about an hour of the alarm going off every 7 minutes for me to claw my way to full consciousness.
Needless to say, I did not make it running this morning. I have plans to go this evening, hopefully for 4+ miles, but the day is young.
Which is the diplomatic way of saying laziness may still get the better of me.
Needless to say, I did not make it running this morning. I have plans to go this evening, hopefully for 4+ miles, but the day is young.
Which is the diplomatic way of saying laziness may still get the better of me.
24 July 2006
We're in it now
I did an 8 mile run on Saturday, and it was awesome. I also went to a kick ass running store: they call themselves "the running company". My little sister was in the market for new shoes (so am I, but I am in less hurry-she runs a whole lot more frequently, and a whole lot harder than I do, and she's been hurting) and they had her walk, measured her pronation, recommended shoes that were of an appropriate level of support (on the low-side of medium: they said too much support is just as bad as not enough), and had a treadmill ready and waiting for her to try them out on (and the lady said if she would rather, she could go for a run around outside, they were okay with that!)
I was impressed. I would go back. And I would also recommend it.
I did a cheerful little three miler this morning. It was chilly enough for a long-sleeve shirt, which is a pleasant change after the heat and humidity of last week.
My main reason for going (sadly, not my verve for the new marathon training schedule, though it is good so far) was nerves: I told my boss this morning that I had applied for another job, and asked him if I could us him as a reference (I really dislike that phrase "can I use you" ugh.). I decided it last night (mostly because the new folks called and asked for my references) and I dreaded it all of last night--I had dreams about abandoned kittens and woke up with a nervous knotted stomach. But I did it. And he took it well: its nothing personal, its all about location, and sweetly he said "you'll break my heart" which I don't think he really means, but was nice of him to say anyway.
So its done.
And I'm still here, at work, and thanks to the running the nerves have mostly subsided. I do enjoy a good run, especially when its helpful.
I was impressed. I would go back. And I would also recommend it.
I did a cheerful little three miler this morning. It was chilly enough for a long-sleeve shirt, which is a pleasant change after the heat and humidity of last week.
My main reason for going (sadly, not my verve for the new marathon training schedule, though it is good so far) was nerves: I told my boss this morning that I had applied for another job, and asked him if I could us him as a reference (I really dislike that phrase "can I use you" ugh.). I decided it last night (mostly because the new folks called and asked for my references) and I dreaded it all of last night--I had dreams about abandoned kittens and woke up with a nervous knotted stomach. But I did it. And he took it well: its nothing personal, its all about location, and sweetly he said "you'll break my heart" which I don't think he really means, but was nice of him to say anyway.
So its done.
And I'm still here, at work, and thanks to the running the nerves have mostly subsided. I do enjoy a good run, especially when its helpful.
19 July 2006
clap!
It was cooler this morning, probably the best morning in over a week for running. Nice and cool, low humidity, and sun. Awesome.
I did a fartlek (hahahaha--such juvenile humor, and yet: I would never say that word in public) this morning that went 1-2-3-2-1; with each number representing minutes of fast-paced no-holds-barred running, followed by an equal number of minutes of calmer, more stately running.
It was awesome, right up until the part where I had to do 2 minutes of sprint-type running.
I did it with a stop watch / heart-rate monitor I got from an old boyfriend as a birthday present (big romantic he was). Its this massive clunky thing that I don't like wearing much, but my usual running watch has decided its time for a summer vacation. So I wore it and re-set for each of the intervals, which was kind of a pain in the ass--given that at the same time I am jabbing at the little buttons I am also running along the side of a moderately busy road.
All in all though, I like interval training, its nice and mostly fun, I recovered fairly quickly after each burst, though the three minute all-out was an uncomfortable wake-up call as far as my level of fitness I think.
To add excitement to awesomness, this is my last day of work for the week! And tomorrow I have an interview at the place I'd like to work! And then I'm hanging out with the little sis for the weekend! Given that she is a freakazoid when it comes to running, undoubtedly we will be doing a lot of that wherever it is we end up being(and she left me two long rambling answering machine messages yesterday about how she wasn't sure where she wanted to go. And now she is camping and unable to phone, so we're just going to wing it on Friday).
I did a fartlek (hahahaha--such juvenile humor, and yet: I would never say that word in public) this morning that went 1-2-3-2-1; with each number representing minutes of fast-paced no-holds-barred running, followed by an equal number of minutes of calmer, more stately running.
It was awesome, right up until the part where I had to do 2 minutes of sprint-type running.
I did it with a stop watch / heart-rate monitor I got from an old boyfriend as a birthday present (big romantic he was). Its this massive clunky thing that I don't like wearing much, but my usual running watch has decided its time for a summer vacation. So I wore it and re-set for each of the intervals, which was kind of a pain in the ass--given that at the same time I am jabbing at the little buttons I am also running along the side of a moderately busy road.
All in all though, I like interval training, its nice and mostly fun, I recovered fairly quickly after each burst, though the three minute all-out was an uncomfortable wake-up call as far as my level of fitness I think.
To add excitement to awesomness, this is my last day of work for the week! And tomorrow I have an interview at the place I'd like to work! And then I'm hanging out with the little sis for the weekend! Given that she is a freakazoid when it comes to running, undoubtedly we will be doing a lot of that wherever it is we end up being(and she left me two long rambling answering machine messages yesterday about how she wasn't sure where she wanted to go. And now she is camping and unable to phone, so we're just going to wing it on Friday).
18 July 2006
All three of us, for the money, that's right!
It is that crazy kind of humid/hot that lets you know its summer. I got up at 5:30 and did three miles this morning and the air is thick enough to compare the run to a swim. When I finished I was dripping wet.
Because of the heat and the early hour, I did (for me) a funny thing. I ran shirtless.
Its one of those things that women with amazing stomachs, triathletes and people who don't eat ice cream can get away with, but not me. I have a polly sort of potato stomach, very pale because I am Irish and work mostly indoors. But putting on another layer to have sweat stick to was just way too unappealing at quarter of six this morning.
When I was in college, I used to drag my friend (and roommate) Lia running from time to time, and she always insisted on shirtless-ness, mainly because she was not a fan of running or clothes and she knew my feelings on shirtless running. I always threatened her with a faster pace, since we lived downtown in a college town and were pretty much guaranteed to see people we knew, but she accepted that and we would go, shirtless, running fast through the streets before breakfast.
As a routine it never lasted very long, it was basically something she did in the rare times she was trying to quit smoking, and she would always end up starting to smoke again, and that would be the end of it.
Its funny to think of it now, given the length of time that has passed since then, and we are still basically the same people. She's still a smoker and occasional runner, and I'm still a runner and not fond of shirtlessness in public places, and though of late (given distance and particular views and opinions) we're more tentative friends, we are still friends, and I'm glad that's the case.
Because of the heat and the early hour, I did (for me) a funny thing. I ran shirtless.
Its one of those things that women with amazing stomachs, triathletes and people who don't eat ice cream can get away with, but not me. I have a polly sort of potato stomach, very pale because I am Irish and work mostly indoors. But putting on another layer to have sweat stick to was just way too unappealing at quarter of six this morning.
When I was in college, I used to drag my friend (and roommate) Lia running from time to time, and she always insisted on shirtless-ness, mainly because she was not a fan of running or clothes and she knew my feelings on shirtless running. I always threatened her with a faster pace, since we lived downtown in a college town and were pretty much guaranteed to see people we knew, but she accepted that and we would go, shirtless, running fast through the streets before breakfast.
As a routine it never lasted very long, it was basically something she did in the rare times she was trying to quit smoking, and she would always end up starting to smoke again, and that would be the end of it.
Its funny to think of it now, given the length of time that has passed since then, and we are still basically the same people. She's still a smoker and occasional runner, and I'm still a runner and not fond of shirtlessness in public places, and though of late (given distance and particular views and opinions) we're more tentative friends, we are still friends, and I'm glad that's the case.
17 July 2006
Hello sunshine
Did a three-miler early on Sunday, not bad, pretty warm. I went out with JLB--its always cool to run with someone else, its something I'd like to do more of, he pointed out that as soon as I hit the flats I sped up, which I hadn't realized I was doing--I'm really pretty terrible about pacing most of the time, and its cool to have someone to keep pace with. The very end of the loop was an all-out sprint--and he beat me! Granted he's got longer legs (unlike me, he is actually built like the classical idea of a runner) but this spring (when he wasn't running at all regularly) I used to beat him to the 'finish' on a regular basis. I just love being able to measure improvement like that. Although its not my improvement, but what the hell, right?
So I haven't been all that politically active lately--just sort of moseying about doing my own thing, not driving much and watching even less TV, but I stumbled across this from Code Pink and was sort of musing about it, and then I went to Solarfest this weekend and listened to all sorts of people who were passionate about change and I'm thinking that I could probably do a juice fast, at the very least, and if not then I need to come up with something because I do believe in "be[ing] the change you want to see in the world". And lately I don't think I really have been doing what I could.
So I haven't been all that politically active lately--just sort of moseying about doing my own thing, not driving much and watching even less TV, but I stumbled across this from Code Pink and was sort of musing about it, and then I went to Solarfest this weekend and listened to all sorts of people who were passionate about change and I'm thinking that I could probably do a juice fast, at the very least, and if not then I need to come up with something because I do believe in "be[ing] the change you want to see in the world". And lately I don't think I really have been doing what I could.
14 July 2006
Fridays are great
The end of the first session of our summer program is awesome. The other two instructors have gone home, but I've got to stay and close the building up at 4, so here I am, doing the sort of time-killing things that get done on a beautiful sunny friday in July when you're one of three people left in the building.
I had lunch with the kids from the session today and it was interesting, we were talking about hydration (since I had 3 empty 8-ounce bottles of water in front of me) and I explained about my brushes with dehydration and why I was careful. The response I got was interesting, mainly because these kids (who are rock climbers and lacrosse players and rugby players) didn't believe that I could run 11 miles--because they didn't think that they could run 11 miles.
I tried to explain that its really having the will to run it more than anything that makes it possible, but that didn't seem to go over too well. But to me thats the truth: that if you want to do it you can do it, as a matter of course. It certainly takes some training, especially if the farthest you've ever run is a mile, but if you're determined you'll get there.
At least I think I will.
No running today: yesterday was a 7-miler and I'm not sure about tomorrow, I'm going to SolarFest with JLB and his bro. So there is some possibility of an early morning run, depending.
Next week is obviously going to have to be more serious if I want to finish the steamtown. I know that a lack of training now will = a world of hurt in a couple of months, so I'm on it.
I had lunch with the kids from the session today and it was interesting, we were talking about hydration (since I had 3 empty 8-ounce bottles of water in front of me) and I explained about my brushes with dehydration and why I was careful. The response I got was interesting, mainly because these kids (who are rock climbers and lacrosse players and rugby players) didn't believe that I could run 11 miles--because they didn't think that they could run 11 miles.
I tried to explain that its really having the will to run it more than anything that makes it possible, but that didn't seem to go over too well. But to me thats the truth: that if you want to do it you can do it, as a matter of course. It certainly takes some training, especially if the farthest you've ever run is a mile, but if you're determined you'll get there.
At least I think I will.
No running today: yesterday was a 7-miler and I'm not sure about tomorrow, I'm going to SolarFest with JLB and his bro. So there is some possibility of an early morning run, depending.
Next week is obviously going to have to be more serious if I want to finish the steamtown. I know that a lack of training now will = a world of hurt in a couple of months, so I'm on it.
13 July 2006
Portable support
There was a lot of roadkill on the road this morning.
I'm going to be working with a group until around ten tonight, so I was able to have a 'leisurely' morning: got up at 6:30 and went for a nice seven mile run in the rain (it should have been 8 but I just couldn't take the humidity). I think something about the wet weather, in the wake of all the heat we had been having, that called to all the little frogs and toads and moles and even one skunk and as I ran this morning I had to keep taking leaping steps to avoid all of their poor flattened bodies. I saw one very pregnant frog who looked as though she had exploded at the roadside. Its really enough to make you nauseous. And the slugs. They're awful. Very orange and long and they have crept out of the fields and onto this one particular section of road and something about the heat--some of them have sort of dessicated and dried out and they sort of ~pop~ if you step on them. During that stretch I run in the middle of the road, where they are at their fewest, if at all possible.
Sometimes I try and ignore the roadkill, and on other days, if I'm feeling at all morbid I think of them as warnings to me, or to all runners on that road, that cars cannot be trusted, that maybe humanity itself cannot be trusted.
today wasn't one of those days though, because I knew that when I got back to my apartment there was a nice shower and fantastic wheat toast with peanutbutter waiting for me, and a long list of weekday-type errands to run before work.
Days like this make me wish I worked part time. Or not at all. By noon I had gotten loads accomplished and was ready to eat and take a nap instead of coming in to work, but sadly it was not to be.
Maybe some other time.
I'm going to be working with a group until around ten tonight, so I was able to have a 'leisurely' morning: got up at 6:30 and went for a nice seven mile run in the rain (it should have been 8 but I just couldn't take the humidity). I think something about the wet weather, in the wake of all the heat we had been having, that called to all the little frogs and toads and moles and even one skunk and as I ran this morning I had to keep taking leaping steps to avoid all of their poor flattened bodies. I saw one very pregnant frog who looked as though she had exploded at the roadside. Its really enough to make you nauseous. And the slugs. They're awful. Very orange and long and they have crept out of the fields and onto this one particular section of road and something about the heat--some of them have sort of dessicated and dried out and they sort of ~pop~ if you step on them. During that stretch I run in the middle of the road, where they are at their fewest, if at all possible.
Sometimes I try and ignore the roadkill, and on other days, if I'm feeling at all morbid I think of them as warnings to me, or to all runners on that road, that cars cannot be trusted, that maybe humanity itself cannot be trusted.
today wasn't one of those days though, because I knew that when I got back to my apartment there was a nice shower and fantastic wheat toast with peanutbutter waiting for me, and a long list of weekday-type errands to run before work.
Days like this make me wish I worked part time. Or not at all. By noon I had gotten loads accomplished and was ready to eat and take a nap instead of coming in to work, but sadly it was not to be.
Maybe some other time.
12 July 2006
Insipid inspiration
I've started teaching a yoga class again--at a little gym the next town over from here, and its great really, to have to do yoga on a regular basis again. It really lessens my aches and pains after awhile.
So they're paying me $10 a class to teach it. (The lady at the desk is like "how does $10 an hour sound" and in my head I'm like "Zounds! Thats real money! Cool!" and then I realize I teach one hour a week and as I'm saying "Sure!" outloud I'm thinking "$10 a week? Good thing I have another job already, cause I'm sure not hitting the big time with this one") This week I took my $10 straight to the little rite aid in town and bought a runners world and an ice cream and that took care of that.
The August issue of Runner's World is pretty good though, especially if you're looking at training for a marathon and feeling slackerly because (and it fell open to the page in the store and I though "hells yes") there is a slackers marathon training plan . Oh yes there is.
Not that I'm saying I'm going to follow it necessarily, but I cut it out and put it on my fridge.
Also there is an article by Nicholas Sparks (the guy who wrote The Notebook, which I haven't read but from what I heard is a sob-fest about love) that is at points a tear-jerker. Do you think he is sad all the time? Or that he is incapable of writing anything happy? I'm wondering.
Today should be an 8-mile day I think. But I also want to go into town and I'm not sure how it will work to do both--its too bad that there is no way to combine the two, but I think I'd look funny running with my bags of Salvation Army clothes anyway.
So they're paying me $10 a class to teach it. (The lady at the desk is like "how does $10 an hour sound" and in my head I'm like "Zounds! Thats real money! Cool!" and then I realize I teach one hour a week and as I'm saying "Sure!" outloud I'm thinking "$10 a week? Good thing I have another job already, cause I'm sure not hitting the big time with this one") This week I took my $10 straight to the little rite aid in town and bought a runners world and an ice cream and that took care of that.
The August issue of Runner's World is pretty good though, especially if you're looking at training for a marathon and feeling slackerly because (and it fell open to the page in the store and I though "hells yes") there is a slackers marathon training plan . Oh yes there is.
Not that I'm saying I'm going to follow it necessarily, but I cut it out and put it on my fridge.
Also there is an article by Nicholas Sparks (the guy who wrote The Notebook, which I haven't read but from what I heard is a sob-fest about love) that is at points a tear-jerker. Do you think he is sad all the time? Or that he is incapable of writing anything happy? I'm wondering.
Today should be an 8-mile day I think. But I also want to go into town and I'm not sure how it will work to do both--its too bad that there is no way to combine the two, but I think I'd look funny running with my bags of Salvation Army clothes anyway.
10 July 2006
When does something become a classic? And is that just a polite way of saying "older than dirt"?
I know, I know, I should have updated on Friday, and Saturday too probably but I was too busy watching pictures of burned books on Friday (and recoiling in horror) and Saturday I was mostly productive (although I did substitute eating ice cream for running, which is pathetic, I know, but happens sometimes with me). But any way: here I be.
And--oooh guess what?! Guess what I saw! Chariots of fire oh yes I did. And let me tell you: if I ever decide to be a hurdler I want to train with Lindsey. Full champagne glasses on hurdles just seems like the right way to train for that sort of thing.
But really, they were all about speed. And short distances. And to quote a blues song I heard once: baby, I ain't built for speed (the line in the song starts "I'm built for comfort..." Its a good one).
But, I think I want to try it.
I've decided to throw some speedwork into the mix. I think it will do me good. I've been really digging the interval training I've done, though most of it has been slightly haphazard. But I found an old 10k speedwork guide taped to my fridge on Saturday while I was being mostly productive, and I think I can do at least a little of it on light days during the training--and it could be really good for me--especially since I'm going to be running with speedsters in the fall.
*I forgot to say that I did a six this am and it rocked like a rocky thing--also I've started teaching yoga again--more another time*
And--oooh guess what?! Guess what I saw! Chariots of fire oh yes I did. And let me tell you: if I ever decide to be a hurdler I want to train with Lindsey. Full champagne glasses on hurdles just seems like the right way to train for that sort of thing.
But really, they were all about speed. And short distances. And to quote a blues song I heard once: baby, I ain't built for speed (the line in the song starts "I'm built for comfort..." Its a good one).
But, I think I want to try it.
I've decided to throw some speedwork into the mix. I think it will do me good. I've been really digging the interval training I've done, though most of it has been slightly haphazard. But I found an old 10k speedwork guide taped to my fridge on Saturday while I was being mostly productive, and I think I can do at least a little of it on light days during the training--and it could be really good for me--especially since I'm going to be running with speedsters in the fall.
*I forgot to say that I did a six this am and it rocked like a rocky thing--also I've started teaching yoga again--more another time*
06 July 2006
the cupcake was a loner
So: its been a long little while since I typed anything in here. To update: I've picked a training program to modify, and I'm (tentatively) committed to a marathon in early October. I say tentatively because, well, it turns out that of the four people I thought I was running it with (all of whom I saw this weekend, so its all new news) one has opted out because she's going to be in school and running track (hurdles, and she rocks at it) one has opted out because she has hurt herself (the ever-fragile knees) and is already doing PT type stuff, and the other two (the nuts) are trying to qualify for Boston with this race. Which is cool, don't get me wrong. I've been down to watch Boston, the year I lived there I stood in Kenmore square and cheered with a kazillion other people and it is a hell of a good time all around, but its a pretty intense qualifying time. 3:40? Oh man. Thats like eight and a half minute miles. For twenty six miles. ugggggh.
This is my little way of saying my lazy ass isn't up to it and the only way I'll be running the Boston Marathon this coming spring is as a pirate. I've talked to several people (one of them is running the steamtown with me--and is determined to qualify and run it this time) who have pirated the race, and I guess there are a lot of pirates: you just start behind all the actual qualified runners and get culled out at the finish where they assign places and such. That might be do-able, though again I will say tentatively.
This is my little way of saying my lazy ass isn't up to it and the only way I'll be running the Boston Marathon this coming spring is as a pirate. I've talked to several people (one of them is running the steamtown with me--and is determined to qualify and run it this time) who have pirated the race, and I guess there are a lot of pirates: you just start behind all the actual qualified runners and get culled out at the finish where they assign places and such. That might be do-able, though again I will say tentatively.